


Close your eyes

by Forever_Cynical



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Heavy Angst, no happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-16
Updated: 2018-02-16
Packaged: 2019-03-19 12:56:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 575
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13704924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Forever_Cynical/pseuds/Forever_Cynical
Summary: One night in Alex’s alcohol fuelled mind.I still remember how you smell. How rooms would fill with the soft smell of apples and honey. I remember the way your skin would feel as o pressed my lips to it. Softly. So softly that you were never sure if I had kissed you or not.





	Close your eyes

I still remember how you smell. How rooms would fill with the soft smell of apples and honey. I remember the way your skin would feel as o pressed my lips to it. Softly. So softly that you were never sure if I had kissed you or not.

You were slice of a life I never thought I would have. You were a slice of a life filled with love and wonder, a life I never thought was for me. As I close my eyes, my body ache to go back, back to when I could still say your name without feeling the loss of the part of me you stole, when you walked out of that door. You never looked back and I wish you would have. Wish you would have given me one final look. One more chance to ask you to stay, even though I couldn’t.

Alcohol burns my throat and dulls my senses but I can still taste you on my lips. It’s been months, it’s been weeks and it’s been days and hours and seconds but my desperation grows and I long for you. There’s no forgetting you. I feel so weak and I hate it. Hate that I cannot forget your name or the future in my hand. That I still I still see your watery smile and goodbye every time I close my eyes.

I long for you, Mags.

I long for what we were and for what we could have had.

I never thought loving someone would hurt this much.

I dreamt many times of how you would walk back through the door and we would both apologise. I would gather you in my arms and you would tell me how you had thought about it and how you had changed your mind. We would raise a family and grow old together. By the third week I realised that, that was all it was every going to be. A dream.

Maybe you had always just been a dream to me. I would have happily dreamt of your forever and in my dreams you wouldn’t leave.

I love you, you had whispered one night, into my hair.

Forever, I had murmured back.

My memories are tinged with a melancholy sadness that I just can’t seem to shake now that your side of the bed is empty.

I long to see you close your eyes as you lean into me before our lips brush. I long for the blissful ignorance that we had lived in before our differing paths had forced us apart. The taste of you still lingering in my mouth as you walked away, please stay, my heart screams. I could have burnt all the bridges down around me, I could scream and I did cry.

But what would that achieve?

You aren’t coming back.

And I still can’t bring myself to delete your number off my phone.

Close your eyes one last time for me and kiss me like we aren’t broken, Mags.

The whiskey burns my throat and I need it to numb this pain.

I tell myself they’ll be others but I just can’t get you out of my mind. Your smile dared me to love you and oh darling, I did.

I need to numb this pain and I need to stop loving you.

But I can’t and I won’t forget you.

My Detective Sawyer.

Close your eyes, one last time for me.


End file.
